11 Excuses: for being weird

Hey guys.  Ahh, Friday.  A day for celebration, of the end of the school/work week and the beginning of the weekend.  Which let’s face it is really a bad name for it, however, instead of going further with this I will just add it to a list of future rants and begin the actual post.  So today I am bringing back the excuses.  To start if off I am gonna talk about something I have some serious experience in.  Being weird.

1.  I had coffee.  Which is connected to the caffeine bone.  And that connects to the hyper wire!  Ok.  Maybe not that wording but I think you get my point.

2.  I don’t sleep at night!  Because nothing says, “I am not as weird as I seem!” as when a person screams a random fact about themselves.

3.  Je ne parle pas anglais!  French.

3.  It doesn’t matter if you love him or capital H-I-M
Just put your paws up
‘Cause you were born this way, baby

My mama told me when I was young
We are all born superstars
She rolled my hair and put my lipstick on
In the glass of her boudoir

There’s nothin’ wrong with lovin’ who you are
She said, ’cause He made you perfect, babe
So hold your head up, girl and you you’ll go far
Listen to me when I say

I’m beautiful in my way
‘Cause God makes no mistakes
I’m on the right track, baby
I was born this way

Don’t hide yourself in regret
Just love yourself and you’re set
I’m on the right track, baby
I was born this way, born this way

Ooh, there ain’t no other way, baby, I was born this way
Baby, I was born this way
Ooh, there ain’t no other way, baby, I was born this way
I’m on the right track, baby, I was born this way

Don’t be a drag, just be a queen
Don’t be a drag, just be a queen
Don’t be a drag, just be a queen
Don’t be

Give yourself prudence and love your friends
Subway kid, rejoice of truth
In the religion of the insecure
I must be myself, respect my youth

A different lover is not a sin
Believe capital H-I-M
I love my life, I love this record and
Mi amore vole fe yah

I’m beautiful in my way,
‘Cause God makes no mistakes
I’m on the right track, baby
I was born this way

Don’t hide yourself in regret,
Just love yourself and you’re set
I’m on the right track, baby
I was born this way

Ooh, there ain’t no other way, baby, I was born this way
Baby, I was born this way
Ooh, there ain’t no other way, baby, I was born this way
I’m on the right track, baby, I was born this way

Don’t be drag, just be a queen
Whether you’re broke or evergreen
You’re black, white, beige, chola descent
You’re Lebanese, you’re orient

Whether life’s disabilities
Left you outcast, bullied or teased
Rejoice and love yourself today
‘Cause baby, you were born this way

No matter gay, straight or bi
Lesbian, transgendered life
I’m on the right track, baby
I was born to survive

No matter black, white or beige
Chola or orient made
I’m on the right track, baby
I was born to be brave

I’m beautiful in my way
‘Cause God makes no mistakes
I’m on the right track, baby
I was born this way

Don’t hide yourself in regret,
Just love yourself and you’re set
I’m on the right track, baby
I was born this way, yeah

Ooh, there ain’t no other way, baby, I was born this way
Baby, I was born this way
Ooh, there ain’t no other way, baby, I was born this way
I’m on the right track, baby, I was born this way
I was born this way, hey
I was born this way, hey
I’m on the right track, baby, I was born this way, hey

I was born this way, hey
I was born this way, hey
I’m on the right track, baby, I was born this way, hey

Yeah.  I went there.

4.  I was kicked in the head by a flying hippo as a child.  Yep.  Just say something like that.

5.  The raccoon likes me!  Why can’t you?  Look.  I have run out of ideas.

6.  The Devil told me to do it!  🙂

7.  If you’re happy and you know it clap your hands!  *claps*  Why didn’t you clap with me?  Oh, yeah, because you’re not being WEIRD makes you sad!  Fact.

8.  The telly did it to me!  It was the gay porn!  Ok.  It’s late and I really am tired.  Only 3 more to go…  However, in my humble opinion I really do believe that is is the best one I have come up with.

9.  Ouch.  You hurt me.  Sarcasm.  My favorite thing, EVER!

10.  You’re ugly face drove me to the point of insanity!  And it may not even be a lie!

11.  The hair dye got in my brain, man… Say it in that hippy, calm, druggie tone.  Makes it better.

Ok.  I am sorry for *this*.  I know it sucked.  But I was distracted so many times by Chrome being such a clear choice for a browser that I am honestly surprised I even finished this.